Patek Philippe's Cubitus: The Square That Broke the Internet (And Maybe Some Hearts)

When Patek Philippe unveiled the Cubitus in October 2024, the watch world collectively did a double-take. Some called it revolutionary. Others called it... well, let's keep this family-friendly. Nobody expected Patek's first new men's collection in 27 years to cause this much drama.

The shape that launched a thousand memes

Picture this: you're Patek Philippe. You haven't released a new men's collection since the Aquanaut in 1997. The anticipation is enormous. And then you drop a square watch that looks suspiciously like your discontinued Nautilus went through a geometry class.

The Cubitus (named after the Latin word for "elbow," because nothing says luxury like naming your watch after a body part) has an eight-sided square case with rounded edges. It's basically the Nautilus made square. And someone at Patek signed off on it.

Size matters, and Patek learned the hard way

The original Cubitus came in at 45mm. For context, that's enormous. One collector described it as "a wrist-mounted billboard announcing you have money but questionable taste."

Here's what's telling, though. At Watches & Wonders 2025, Patek unveiled 40mm versions. Releasing a smaller version six months later is the horological equivalent of ordering a pizza that's too big and then cutting it into smaller slices. Technically solves the problem, but everyone knows what happened.

The price of controversy

Let's talk numbers, because in the watch world, controversy sells better than a Black Friday discount at IKEA.

• Retail price for the steel Cubitus: $41,240 (or as we'd say in Europe, "a decent car")
• Grey market price: nearly 4x retail (because apparently people love watches they claim to hate)

Thierry Stern's hot take

Just when things couldn't get spicier, Patek's president Thierry Stern decided to pour gasoline on the fire. In an interview, he dismissed critics as "haters" who "have never had a Patek and never will."

That's like Gordon Ramsay telling people who don't like his food that they probably eat at McDonald's. True? Maybe. Diplomatic? About as much as wearing a Hublot to a Patek boutique.

The design debate

Let's be honest. The Cubitus looks like what would happen if a Nautilus and a Cartier Santos had a baby, and that baby was raised by Apple Watch designers. The horizontal embossed dial pattern comes straight from the Nautilus playbook. The integrated bracelet? Nautilus again. The only truly original element is the square shape, and Cartier's been doing that since your grandparents were young.

Some design critics have pointed out that the dial layout seems off. The subdials create an awkward triangle that makes the whole face look unbalanced. It's the horological equivalent of hanging a picture frame slightly crooked. You can't unsee it once you notice.

So, is it actually bad?

Here's the plot twist: despite all the criticism, people who've actually worn the Cubitus report it's... quite nice. The finishing is impeccable (it's still Patek, after all). The thin profile makes it comfortable. And the smaller 40mm version actually works on normal human wrists.

It's like that controversial movie everyone hates online but secretly enjoys. Or pineapple on pizza. Divisive in theory, surprisingly decent in practice.

Love it or hate it, you can't ignore it

The Cubitus might be the most talked-about watch release since Patek discontinued the Nautilus. Coincidence? Probably not. Patek knew exactly what they were doing. They created a conversation piece that happens to tell time.

Will it become a classic like the Nautilus? Only time will tell. But in an industry that often plays it safe, Patek took a risk. Even if that risk looks like a square peg trying to fit in a round hole.

The bottom line

Whether you think the Cubitus is a masterpiece or a mistake, you have to admire Patek's confidence. It takes guts to release something this divisive when you could have just made another round watch and called it a day.

Controversial watches have a funny track record, though. The Royal Oak was hated when it launched. The Nautilus was called too sporty for Patek. Maybe in 20 years, we'll all be fighting over Cubitus allocations.

Or maybe not. Either way, it's been entertaining to watch.

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We might not have a Cubitus in our collection (yet), but we have timepieces that won't divide your friend group or require a second mortgage. Browse our collection